12 years ago I use to play basketball. I thought I was a bad ass. Even with a repaired knee. I had torn my ACL when I was 18, but I was in decent shape. I worked out every day.
2012 I started experiencing weakness in my legs. The doctors could never figure it out. One said it was inflammation, maybe fibromyalgia. One even diagnosed me with rheumatoid arthritis and so I walked around thinking I had this. I didn’t. I was diagnosed wrong, I’m thankful that I never started any medication. I tried diets where I cut out gluten, dairy etc. etc.
But nothing worked.
One day when I was working on my legs and pressing, I couldn’t.
All this was the beginning of a slippery slope for me. I had always experienced weight issues. I have always had to work hard to stay in shape. I was doing that, but this whole health thing messed me up. My anxiety and depression worsened.
First I stopped working out little by little, and then I started emotional eating more and more. Then layer after layer all of these things started to bury me.
One day I woke up and I was 240 pounds. I had No hope and I had completely given up. All the pain and exhaustion had become more severe with the extra weight. My self-talk was negative. I truly hated myself.
Fast forward to today. I’m on the right path. I’m putting in the inner work and outside work. All the support and tools from WW and the WW Instsagram community have been so supportive and inner self love building.
Today, I’m not in as much pain. Whatever was happening to my body back in 2012 has somewhat resolved. I’m not as exhausted as I once was and my health took a 360.
I’m getting back to me and with reflection on where I was, I realized that I was under a lot of stress because I was recovering from a divorce back in 2007. All that I had bottled up was coming out emotionally. Pain, sadness and stress has to release somewhere and if you don’t find a way to do it and you push it down, it will usually be your health that takes the hit.
Your mental health is a huge factor in your overall health. That’s why mental health awareness and the stigma needs to change.
I posted this because I wanted to share a deeper side of my journey and where I was, where I went, where I am now.
One day I might even play b-ball again, badly.